Living with Mental Illness

Mental illness is a broad term used to describe a wide range of disorders. Depending on the disorder, the illness can affect one’s ability to work, attend school, and have meaningful relationships. Common mental disorders are major depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, schizophrenia, and alcohol and drug abuse. A commitment from family members, people within the community, health care systems, and the law can assist in securing a productive future for people with a mental illness. There are approximately 400 programs that provide those people with a mental illness a supportive network that provides a sense of belonging, educational opportunities, housing, and jobs. Strange, unpredictable behaviors in a loved one can be devastating and can increase your own personal anxiety. It is important to understand this is a symptom of the disorder and to not take it personally. Over time, family members are able to find strength they didn’t know they had and gain knowledge and skills to cope with the challenges resulting from mental illness. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) has a variety of resources including an educational program developed specifically for family members.

Communicating with a loved one whose speech is limited by a mental deficiency requires a skill that can be developed. These tools can help in communicating effectively and smoothly.

• Maintain a calm, low volume. Speaking louder does not help in making it easier for someone with a mental illness to understand. Pause between words so listeners can determine where one word ends and the other begins.
• Keep your hands away from your mouth because listeners prefer to watch your lips.
• Use simple words and simple subject-verb-object statements.
• Keep in mind the ‘mental’ age of the person you are speaking to rather than their ‘calendar’ age.
• Do not mimic the mentally challenged speaker. This confuses your listener, and beyond that, it can give them the wrong impression that you are not sensitive to their handicap.
• Look them in the eye. Even if they don’t make eye contact with you, this shows you are interested in what they are saying.

Tips to remember about a mental illness:

• Mental illness cannot be cured.
• Mental disorders not only affect the person with the disorder. It affects everyone who cares about them.
• No matter how much effort a loved one puts in, the symptoms may get better or worse. This is out of anyone’s control.
• It is important to separate the person from the disorder and its symptoms.
• Direct any anger or resentment towards the illness and not the person.
• Your loved one may find it difficult to accept the disorder.
• Often it is not possible for the needs of the ill person to come first. This is okay.
• Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Establish boundaries. Exercise, maintain good nutrition, and develop loving relationships. Spiritual or religious support, support groups that can be found through NAMI, psychotherapy support, and hobbies can help with self-care. Remember, you are not alone. Support groups can be so helpful and enlightening which is why NAMI has thousands of support groups across the nation. The support can help reduce isolation and stress.