How Do You Include a Parent With Alzheimer’s in Family Gatherings?

Family gatherings are hard when a parent has Alzheimer’s and is reaching the late stages of the disease. Special gatherings like holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries will not mean much to your mom or dad. There’s no recollection of date or time of year, so your parent isn’t going to remember why you’re celebrating.

Before bringing your parent to a family gathering, you have to decide if it’s better for your mom or dad to go or stay with a caregiver. As much as you want to include your parent, it may be better for your parent to stay in a home or apartment where things are familiar and comforting. A new home isn’t always ideal for a parent with Alzheimer’s.

 

Keep Gatherings Small

Caregiver Evanston, IL: Alzheimer’s and Family Gatherings

Sometimes, large gatherings are too much. A crowd of six may seem small to you, but it’s overwhelming to your parent. Keep gatherings to no more than a few people. Do not include your parent in a gathering where there will be new faces.

You may have to hold multiple gatherings to guarantee gatherings are small. Your mom or dad should be comfortable. If it’s that inconvenient, hold a larger party without your mom or dad. Later, a few of you can celebrate again with your parent.

Make sure anyone at the gathering is aware of the basic rules of socializing with your parent. If your parent repeats him/herself, it shouldn’t be pointed out. Comments like “you already told me” cannot happen. Patience, kindness, and simple phrasing are essential.

 

Make Plans for Anxiety and Agitation

As the memories slip away, you may find your mom or dad becoming frustrated and even panicking during gatherings. There are too many people. Too many conversations and too much background noise are hard to handle. You’re going to need to have a quiet, calm setting where your mom or dad can go to calm down and manage the panic and anxiety.

A room that no one else is allowed in is a good start. Set that room up with a calming scent, such as lavender, and lighting that is bright enough to fill corners. A comfortable chair, favorite snacks and beverages, and soothing music are also ideal for a quiet space.

Caregivers are helpful when you have plans and cannot leave your parent alone. Arrange home care services from time to time. You’ll take a needed break, but your mom or dad doesn’t have to be alone and at risk. Call a home care agency to arrange respite care with caregivers.

 

If you or an aging loved one are considering a Caregiver in Evanston, IL, contact the caring staff at Companion Services of America today at (847) 943-3786. Our home care service area includes Northbrook, Highland Park, Deerfield, Glenview, Buffalo Grove, Evanston, Des Plaines, Skokie, Lake Forest, Wilmette and the surrounding areas.

Jamie Shapiro